Mastering Your Desires

Wrestling With Desire

“But every man is tempted, when he is drawn away of his own lust, and enticed. Then when lust hath conceived, it bringeth forth sin: and sin, when it is finished, bringeth forth death.”
James 1:14–15 KJV

These scriptures are striking and surprising. They force us to ask the questions most people are scared to voice:

Are my desires evil?
Why did God create me with desires He doesn’t want me to enjoy?
Can God take the desires away?

These questions arise especially when you keep going back to the same places you no longer want to go, doing the same things you no longer want to do, and you can’t understand why you can’t stop.

So is there something wrong with you?
Yes. There’s something wrong with all of us.

After the fall of man, humanity drifted from the original intent and purpose of Yahweh. Man became a lost agent trying to govern himself after surrendering his authority to a false king who has no interest in his well-being.

“Wherefore, as by one man sin entered into the world, and death by sin…”
Romans 5:12 KJV

Through one man’s actions, the world became what it is now. So yes, something is wrong, but not because you were created broken. Something is wrong because something precious was lost from the beginning. Trying to restore identity without God is what gave birth to what we call religion today. It is man’s attempt to restore relationship with his Maker and regain his authority.

In the records of Genesis (the book of beginnings), we see the perfect state of man in chapters 1 and 2. By chapter 3, we see an entity in the form of a serpent, whose nature was sin, enter the scene. By deceitful cunningness, he introduced the male and female to his sin nature. Adam and Eve accepted the deal and traded their image for another’s. From that moment on, humanity inherited a corrupted nature-one not from their Maker but from the enemy.

“For all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God.”
Romans 3:23 KJV

You inherited the corrupted image of the first man who gave up what God gave him. That’s why your desires feel twisted-not because desire itself is evil, but because sin corrupted what God made good.

“Then God saw everything that He had made, and indeed it was very good.”
Genesis 1:31 NKJV

“Now then it is no more I that do it, but sin that dwelleth in me.”
Romans 7:17 KJV

Most of us think the problem is the sin we’re struggling with, but that’s not the primary issue.

Adam had the same desire you have today: the desire to be loved. Out of the desire to be loved comes all other desires. Even the fruits of the Spirit are but an expression of love.

“But above all these things put on love, which is the bond of perfection.”
Colossians 3:14 NKJV

It’s because of the desire to be loved that a woman can become a whore, a man can choose to be a woman, and likewise a woman can choose to be a man. It’s because of this desire that a girl can become rebellious and a boy can become disobedient. This desire comes with a fire that one cannot hold.

Love is so powerful that it moved God to give His only begotten Son (John 3:16). If love can move God that deeply, imagine what it can do to you.

When God created man-the spirit that dwells in the male and female-the primary purpose was to display His love toward him (the male man). In addition, He created the female man so that the male man, created in His image, could be like Him, displaying his love toward the woman. So it’s because of this desire that you find yourself faced with the temptations you’re struggling with.

Your desires aren’t evil. They were given to you to bless you within the right boundaries. But once corrupted, the very desires meant to lift you can pull you into destruction.

Now that you understand why desire feels so uncontrollable, let’s transition into the keys that will help you regain mastery.

What Do You Need?

You Need a Savior

If your nature is corrupted, then no amount of therapy, discipline, positive thinking, or self-made programs will fix you. You cannot counsel a sinful nature. You cannot discipline corruption into purity.

You need a Savior.

In Genesis 3, after the fall, God declared:

“And I will put enmity Between you and the woman, And between your seed and her Seed; He shall bruise your head, And you shall bruise His heel.”
Genesis 3:15 NKJV

From the foundation of the world, God had already prepared redemption through the Seed of the woman: Yahusha, the Messiah.

“For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life. For God did not send His Son into the world to condemn the world, but that the world through Him might be saved.”
John 3:16–17 NKJV

Christ renews the spirit back to the original intent of the Maker.

Therapy cannot fix sin nature.
Self-help cannot fix sin nature.
Discipline cannot fix sin nature.
Affirmations cannot fix sin nature.

The problem is not your habits; it’s your nature.

“The Spirit of the Lord is upon Me, Because He has anointed Me To preach the gospel to the poor; He has sent Me to heal the brokenhearted, To proclaim liberty to the captives
And recovery of sight to the blind, To set at liberty those who are oppressed.”
Luke 4:18 NKJV

You will not stop sinning until you receive Christ. Only then can the old nature die and the new one live. When your spirit is renewed, the rest of your system finally has a chance to be transformed.

“I have been crucified with Christ; it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me; and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself for me.”
Galatians 2:20 NKJV

Until that happens, the older nature will always dominate you.

“If the Son therefore shall make you free, ye shall be free indeed.”
John 8:36 KJV

Once you receive salvation, you don’t instantly become perfect, but your spirit becomes alive again, and that gives you the foundation for the next step.

Renewing Your Mind

After salvation, your spirit becomes new, but your mind remains old. Your emotions remain old. Your habits remain old. The soul you lived with for years must now serve the newborn spirit.

“And the Lord said to her: ‘Two nations are in your womb, Two peoples shall be separated from your body; One people shall be stronger than the other, And the older shall serve the younger.’”
Genesis 25:23 NKJV

Can you imagine the older serving the younger sibling? That’s not what we naturally expect. In many cultures, it’s rare to see this happen. So it really requires that you:

“Be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind.”
Romans 12:2 KJV

Renewing your mind stabilizes the new life. It requires seeking knowledge, understanding, and wisdom. Without the mind’s renewal, the spirit suffers and eventually returns to slavery.

One major benefit of renewing the mind is the development of non-negotiables: spiritual default settings.

Every device comes with default settings. You personalize them, but the defaults define the system. When you renew your mind, the Word becomes your default.

“Thy word have I hid in mine heart, that I might not sin against thee.”
Psalm 119:11 KJV

A non-negotiable is what Job declared:

“I made a covenant with mine eyes; why then should I think upon a maid?”
Job 31:1 KJV

A non-negotiable is a decision made before the temptation arrives. It is your default choice deep within the subconscious-the place where real decisions are made.

Examples:

I will never lie.
I will not sleep with someone who is not my spouse.
I will not steal.
I will serve the Lord regardless of what others do (Joshua 24:15).

The three Hebrew boys had non-negotiables:
“Even if our God does not deliver us, we will not bow.”

Renewing the mind hardwires these commitments. This requires discipline and character formation, but the good news is that the Helper-the Holy Spirit, is now with you. He becomes your personal tutor in all matters of this new life.

“But the Helper, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in My name, He will teach you all things, and bring to your remembrance all things that I said to you.”
John 14:26 NKJV

You must cultivate a deep relationship with the Holy Spirit if you want this new life to be solidified and unshaken. He teaches, convicts, strengthens, and walks with you daily. It is through the renewing of your mind, in partnership with the Holy Spirit, that you gain the strength to engage in the other spiritual disciplines like prayer and fasting. A mind conditioned by the Word produces an effective prayer and fasting life.

But even with the Holy Spirit, God still uses people to shape you, which leads naturally to the final key.

You Need a Father and a Mentor

You were never meant to grow alone. You need someone who can guide you, sharpen you, correct you without you falling into pride, and walk with you through spiritual formation.

“Though ye have ten thousand instructors… yet have ye not many fathers.”
1 Corinthians 4:15 KJV

While I’m at this point, let me pause to express my gratitude for a father and mentor in my life: Prophet Elie T. F. Kanza, a dynamic leader and a friend of the highest respect. I honor you, Sir.

I want to pull a few quotes from his book The Mystery of Fatherhood, a book that has greatly shaped my perspective on fathers and mentors. In it he said:

“Spiritual fatherhood is rooted in mentorship and guidance.”
“Fathers impart spiritual intelligence and dignity.”
“Fatherhood bridges generations and preserves wisdom.”
“True fatherhood builds a legacy that outlives the father.”
“Fathers are investors of legacy.”

What powerful words of wisdom. Hence the reason you need fathers and mentors.

A true spiritual father accelerates your transformation, protects you from unnecessary battles, and deposits identity and wisdom in you. Mentors sharpen your skills, but a father shapes your nature.

You can have many mentors. You can only have one spiritual father.

They say, “If you want to go fast, go alone; and if you want to go far, go with others.”

I say, “If you want to go fast and far, get a father and a mentor.”

Now that you have these keys at your disposal, you can use them to unlock yourself from the corruption of your desires and start using them in the right light and context.

Final Takeaways

To master your desires you must:

Get Saved: Accept Yahusha, The Messiah
You cannot overcome corrupted desires without a renewed spirit.

Renew Your Mind
Build non-negotiables through the Word, discipline, and the Holy Spirit.

Get a Father and Mentor
You accelerate when you’re guided. You stabilize when you’re fathered.

Your desires were never the problem. Your nature was. And now you know how to restore both.

Shalom!